3/26/12 patrol (Rage of a Thief: I AM SO FRUSTRATED)

[Border Patrol]

Citizens!,

The March 26th patrol begins when I meet up with Captain Turbo at West Britain Bank. Little did we know how akward the night would start off for us....

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Yuri and Valon approaches Turbo and I. They start to accuse me of running an illegal pimping operation. I admit that I was offered the position but state the fact that I had declined it. Yuri continues to spread lies and rumors after I had already discredited them as false.

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They go further with their false accusations and claim I paid for "certain services." I respond by stating all these are fabrications.

After that accusation they try to bribe BPD officers and ask if we take bribes. When I let them know that we cannot be bribed they push the issue saying that everyone has a price. Only problem with that logic is that the BPD is not everyone. We are different.

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I let them know that the BPD has no need of money. What we want is Justice! The conversation degrades further into other false accusations.

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We leave the accusing couple to their own sick imaginations and give a public announcement to the citizens.

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Jizzum fails to comply with the laws Lord British has set for the citizens to follow. Justice comes swift and fierce and we punish this hoodlum for his transgressions against others.

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Jizzum gates in on an alternate character and starts swearing at us, calling us hateful bigoted names, and he is in full rage mode.

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Then he starts complaining about what happens to him when we are not around. Two wrongs do not make a right in the name of Order. Instead it creates Chaos.

part 2 is next.

[Border Patrol]

Jizzum's raging continues with anti semitic insults, mom jokes, and personal attacks about our intelligence. He seems really really frustrated.

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Turbo responds with the truth regarding the matter. When we are around Justice will be served!

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I tell Jizzum that if he does not commit crimes he will not pay fines. He does not care and says we are not cops and are just wannabes.

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Jizzum continues his biased and speculative view about us making various claims.

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After Jizzum is done with his hardcore raging Wolf Blitzer fails an attempt at a quick steal on me. I make sure he is punished for his actions. As I attempt to arrest him he starts to try a getaway.

Since he is resisting arrest I have no choice but to pursue with lethal force.

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[Border Patrol]

Wolf Blitzer fails to get away and his corpse is bagged and tagged. He will not be doing any biased reporting anytime soon.

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Back at the bank a criminal named "Dutch" cannot keep his hands to himself. He has stolen from a bank patron and breaks the Law. So we break his skull and impale his body with our weapons of Justice. There is no escape for this thug.

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Turbo had spread out his patrol and found Jizzum somewhere near the smith and graveyard. After sending Jizzum to another much needed timeout Captain Turbo reports to me what had happened.

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A local citizen named Fart Knocker comes out of the library after overhearing Turbo and I's conversation, to say hi, and then goes on his merry way.

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Later on back at the bank we are keeping our eyes on various thieves around the bank. Jizzum asks Turbo a question that he feels is very important about some of the local street scum. Turbo kindly answers the query.

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Jizzum never learns and later on in the night tries to hide amongst his friends after breaking the law. We surround and pound....

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part 4 is next

[Border Patrol]

Jizzum's friends are upset about his demise as Turbo feels the need to give out another warning about how Lord British feels about thievery.

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A citizen in green named "Player" speaks the truth on the matter.

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Turbo makes Player aware of the antics that this particular person is known for.

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The ManPanties intentionally takes Turbo out of context.

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Turbo sets the record straight.

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Jizzum swoops in after being rezzed and starts with the name calling again.

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ManPanties reveals that he is an antisemite as no one from Jizzum's group verbally opposes this view but thinks it is funny instead.

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part 5 is next

[Border Patrol]

As ManPanties is telling an unsavory racist joke Larry hits a BPD anti-theft kit and is deadly poisoned.

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He runs to the otherside of the bank as some of the earlier group start to heal him.

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Larry barely survives death after making the grave mistake. Hopefull he will think twice about snooping a cop next time.

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Wolf Blitzer sees a ring in Turbo's pack and just can't help himself to it. His thieving ways shall not go unpunished!

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Wolf Blitzer fell for a clever plan created by Captain Turbo to reveal and snuff out the thieves involved in a recent jewelry theft ring. Wolf Blitzer fell right into BPD's heavy hand!

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ManPaties continues with his one tracked mind about a particular race.

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part 6 is next

[Border Patrol]

Shortly afterwards, Jizzum tries to steal some of Turbo's gold. BPD goes into hot pursuit with me as the lead pursuer. This criminal act shall not go unanswered! This thief will never learn apparently.

Turbo had taken a different route to try to cut off the perp's escape. Jizzum barely escapes capture. BPD has closed the gap now and Turbo takes over as the lead pursuer.

As we approach the bank I go the opposite way and cut off Jizzum's escape. It is here and now that the chase is brought to an abrupt end.

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Turbo is questioned about the mystery surrounding the ring from earlier.

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As I continue my patrol around the bank I see Wolf Blitzer approaching the bank really fast. I rush over for a frisk but whatever he had stolen was banked before I could serve the Justice he deserved to be dealt.

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Later on Jizzum steals from a tamer and pays the price. The tamer has his grizzly bear kill Jizzum before BPD has a chance to. Vigilante Justice is bittersweet for some. Especially if you name is Jizzum.

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The bank bombers strike again for the 2nd time of the night but fail to kill anyone. Is this what these dark times have come to? Random suicide at an attempt at genocide?

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Jizzum is still frustrated as he has been all night long.

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Does this mean that IRL he is a thief!!!!!!!!??????? *raises eyebrows*

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The conclusion is next

[Border Patrol]

Jizzum is so frustrated he does not know what to do. He tries to hurt my feelings by calling me names and taunting me. Little does he know; I, Border Patrol have no feelings, so there is none to hurt.

The only thing the patroller of borders wants and seeks is Justice! Name calling games are not part of my forte and is beneath me.

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I dont know what filthy wretch raised this foul mouthed bird, but they did not do a very good job!!!

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Jizzum starts brainstorming various ideas out loud.

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Later on I find this at the bank. Geeeee....I wonder who named that horse?

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I am going to close this report out with a final thought. I do not usually do this but today I am.

To me it is absolutely ridiculous the way Jizzum acted. All the cursing, name calling, and acting as if he was a vicitm of some kind. The whole reason he was continually punished over and over again was because; out of the 6 or 7 thieves that were out that night, he was the only one to continually steal right in front of BPD Officers on a constant basis.

By him stealing he was the one creating victims due to him taking other people's things, and he deserved 100% of what he got. A good Ol'fashioned BPD spanking.


Border Patrol out.