Hail Citizens!,
This is my report on my patrol of August 14, 2011. It will be a 5 part report with plenty of criminals and Justice.
As usual, I check in a little early so I can help myslef with complimentary Kolaches sent over by Lord British's servants. On this particular day we got lemon flavor filled ones
On my way through the city, I approach the dock areas. This is when I meet Ruckus, a known criminal. During our conversation he decides to snoop me. Upon his successful snoop he makes my anti-snooping kit go off and he is promptly poisoned.
Ruckus learns being nosey is not always a good thing when Border Patrol is around. He promptly succumbs to the toxic cocktale and turns into a stanky corpse that reeks of a smell akin to dead fish.
As I approach West Britain Bank I see ILuvTitties already been served and some other criminal is being served vigilante Justice.
Everything is peaceful until a vile criminal named Rudyard approaches. He is very very grey and looking for a fight. I am looking for Justice. Since we both know what we are looking for a battle ensues.
Soon the battle sways heavily in my favor and he starts running for his life. I am the only Officer on duty at this time so I have no choice but to chase him and hope he makes a mistake.
Knowing that he got in over his head on this fight he continues to flee in terror. He is running so fast he looks like a grey blur.
The Law finally catches up to this vile criminal and Justice is served with great fury. He is knocked from his mount with the final blow and his spirit leaves it's earthy vessel.
With Rudyard dead his corpse litters one of the main streets in Britain. After his corpse is hauled off the sanitation department comes in to disenfect the area.
Soon after, I meet some poor young soul who is tired of all the InJustice and griefing he has had to deal with here. He tells me that I should be ashamed of what I have done him. I tell the young lad I have done no wrong to him and don't even know who he is. He asks me if I am in BPD and I tell him yes. He explains how me and some other BPD members have been griefing new players who are AFK macroing but were not wearing the tags at the time.
He also tells me that one had my name...Border Patrol. I let him know that it is not me nor is it the BPD force who has done these InJustices to him and others. I explain how Atraxi had warned me of the fake Border Patrol imposter the day before.
After we talk he is curious about the "real" BPD. I show him our HQ and while we are in conversation up walks the imposters. They have come to not only talk smack but to taunt this young lad and me. They both are wearing pink.
That does it for part 1. There is more to come in part 2.
8-14-11 Patrol
- Border Patrol
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- Border Patrol
- Posts: 321
- Joined: Mon Aug 01, 2011 5:41 am
- Location: Britannia
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Re: 8-14-11 Patrol
Part 2 of 5
Part 2 begins with me making my way back to WBB from our HQ when I see this mess going on in public and in broad daylight.
Upon further inspection it appears this lad has been heavily drinking. This should be a lesson to everyone that Llamas and strong drink do not mix. I let the drunkard know that llamas can carry various diseases and once he notices I am there he stops and walks over to the wall of the bank. It is there he passes out after vomiting all over the ground.
All is quiet after the funny business with the Llama so I head over to the local Inn where I find Eluvium up to his thieving ways again. He refuses my demands to hand over the contraband so deadly force is the next step in order to bring Justice to this unsavory individual.
The engagement starts off badly for him and soon he is running for his life.
It is not long and he succumbs to my mace of Justice. His insides quickly become his outsides as he falls off his mount.
Justice is served to this unsightly criminal and he gets to enjoy a well earned time out. His corpse is bagged and tagged.
Not long after Eluvium's demise I am approached by a man known as officer Lynch. After some conversation I find out he is one of the founding members of BPD during the era when Narendra was chief. I pm Atraxi the information and we talk at the HQ waiting for Atraxi to arrive to reinstate Lynch.
Soon Chief Atraxi arrives *salutes*
Officer Lynch is reinstated into the BPD and the department continues it's rebound and growth during the Atraxi Era.
After reinstatement we all hit the mean streets of Britannia looking to serve Justice to those that disobey the laws of Lord British.
Next is part 3 of this 5 part report.
Part 2 begins with me making my way back to WBB from our HQ when I see this mess going on in public and in broad daylight.
Upon further inspection it appears this lad has been heavily drinking. This should be a lesson to everyone that Llamas and strong drink do not mix. I let the drunkard know that llamas can carry various diseases and once he notices I am there he stops and walks over to the wall of the bank. It is there he passes out after vomiting all over the ground.
All is quiet after the funny business with the Llama so I head over to the local Inn where I find Eluvium up to his thieving ways again. He refuses my demands to hand over the contraband so deadly force is the next step in order to bring Justice to this unsavory individual.
The engagement starts off badly for him and soon he is running for his life.
It is not long and he succumbs to my mace of Justice. His insides quickly become his outsides as he falls off his mount.
Justice is served to this unsightly criminal and he gets to enjoy a well earned time out. His corpse is bagged and tagged.
Not long after Eluvium's demise I am approached by a man known as officer Lynch. After some conversation I find out he is one of the founding members of BPD during the era when Narendra was chief. I pm Atraxi the information and we talk at the HQ waiting for Atraxi to arrive to reinstate Lynch.
Soon Chief Atraxi arrives *salutes*
Officer Lynch is reinstated into the BPD and the department continues it's rebound and growth during the Atraxi Era.
After reinstatement we all hit the mean streets of Britannia looking to serve Justice to those that disobey the laws of Lord British.
Next is part 3 of this 5 part report.
- Border Patrol
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- Joined: Mon Aug 01, 2011 5:41 am
- Location: Britannia
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Re: 8-14-11 Patrol
This is part 3 of my report and BPD is out keeping the peace at WBB.
It appears there are no criminals out at this time but we have to stay vigilant. A crime can happen at any moment and we have to be ready to protect the good citizens of Britannia.
As we spread out our patrols I notice a vile criminal along the border at the edge of town!
After the engagement he makes the mistake of going back to town! Britain has mutliple Officers on duty at this time and he pays for his mistake.
His lifeless body lies on the streets like ground beef.
While patroling other parts of the city I come across the good citizen and friend Pied Piper. He donates dogs to the BPD. We use them to sniff out drugs and other various contraband as well as bring criminals to Justice!
Shortly after getting my dogs from Pied Piper I come across the vile criminal Reebdoog. This criminal shall be brought to Justice one way or another!!!!
He tries to run around like the Energizer Bunny but it is not long before Officer Lynch & me bring this scoundrel to Justice. Hopefully he turns from his wicked ways!
No matter the path he chooses; one thing is for sure. He is now dead.
Upon reaching WBB a good citizen of Britannia gives me a gift of magical armor! I thank the young lad and quickly put on this new armor seeing as how it is very strong, druable, and glows with it's powerful magical properties.
This concludes part 3. Part 4 of 5 is next.
It appears there are no criminals out at this time but we have to stay vigilant. A crime can happen at any moment and we have to be ready to protect the good citizens of Britannia.
As we spread out our patrols I notice a vile criminal along the border at the edge of town!
After the engagement he makes the mistake of going back to town! Britain has mutliple Officers on duty at this time and he pays for his mistake.
His lifeless body lies on the streets like ground beef.
While patroling other parts of the city I come across the good citizen and friend Pied Piper. He donates dogs to the BPD. We use them to sniff out drugs and other various contraband as well as bring criminals to Justice!
Shortly after getting my dogs from Pied Piper I come across the vile criminal Reebdoog. This criminal shall be brought to Justice one way or another!!!!
He tries to run around like the Energizer Bunny but it is not long before Officer Lynch & me bring this scoundrel to Justice. Hopefully he turns from his wicked ways!
No matter the path he chooses; one thing is for sure. He is now dead.
Upon reaching WBB a good citizen of Britannia gives me a gift of magical armor! I thank the young lad and quickly put on this new armor seeing as how it is very strong, druable, and glows with it's powerful magical properties.
This concludes part 3. Part 4 of 5 is next.
Last edited by Border Patrol on Thu Aug 18, 2011 5:12 am, edited 1 time in total.
- Border Patrol
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Re: 8-14-11 Patrol
This is part 4 of 5 of my report on this day. It appears a certain individual does not like authority. He flags us many times intentionally to get guardwhacked after verbal insults. This is just one screenshot of the many times he committed suicide by cop...err guard.
Then this miscreant hints at what I am already fully aware of via Forensic skill.....
Upon further inspection of the citizens at the bank I spot Clyde Barrow. He is perma grey so I use the dog I aquired from Pied Piper to take him down with Justice!
It is a long drawn out battle but me and other good citizens cast magical spells to strengthen the Law Dog's resolve and ferocity!
Clyde finally dies and succumbs to Justice at the paws of a canine unit of the BPD. Clyde disagrees with the charges but the BPD has overwhelming evidence against him. Justice is served.
Soon after it is determined LockeDeCalb is perma grey. This criminal will not leave unpunished. LockeDeCalb is served and this evidence of the body will be sent to the coroner's office.
Clyde Barrow steals in front of Officer Lynch and is quickly cut down to size!
LockeDeCalb has not learned his lesson. Officer Lynch goes into hot pursuit with me following to watch....camera in tow
As Mabel Bloodthorn approaches she asks what happened. We let her know it was a vile criminal and "there is nothing further to see here citizen, move along."
As the citizen goes towards the bank to handle errands we are given a warm thank you for all the hard work we do in the name of public safety.
This concludes part 4. Next is the conclusion of this days patrol.
Then this miscreant hints at what I am already fully aware of via Forensic skill.....
Upon further inspection of the citizens at the bank I spot Clyde Barrow. He is perma grey so I use the dog I aquired from Pied Piper to take him down with Justice!
It is a long drawn out battle but me and other good citizens cast magical spells to strengthen the Law Dog's resolve and ferocity!
Clyde finally dies and succumbs to Justice at the paws of a canine unit of the BPD. Clyde disagrees with the charges but the BPD has overwhelming evidence against him. Justice is served.
Soon after it is determined LockeDeCalb is perma grey. This criminal will not leave unpunished. LockeDeCalb is served and this evidence of the body will be sent to the coroner's office.
Clyde Barrow steals in front of Officer Lynch and is quickly cut down to size!
LockeDeCalb has not learned his lesson. Officer Lynch goes into hot pursuit with me following to watch....camera in tow
As Mabel Bloodthorn approaches she asks what happened. We let her know it was a vile criminal and "there is nothing further to see here citizen, move along."
As the citizen goes towards the bank to handle errands we are given a warm thank you for all the hard work we do in the name of public safety.
This concludes part 4. Next is the conclusion of this days patrol.
- Border Patrol
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Re: 8-14-11 Patrol
This is the fianl part of this report. Part 5
It appears a certain non-thief individual named loggins likes to commit suicide. These are only a few screens of him killing himself on my various anti-snooping kits.
Finally he gets down to my more extravagant insta kill explosive snooping kits.
After having some fun watching someone committing suicide over and over again I am fixing to turn in for the night. On may way to log out I come across one last criminal named Danny Ocean. Upon me serving him Justice a grey Mia runs into my screen with Mistah T hot on her trail; but recalls away before I can join the chase.
I decide to get some rest for the night. And this is the end of this days report.
Border Patrol out *salutes*
It appears a certain non-thief individual named loggins likes to commit suicide. These are only a few screens of him killing himself on my various anti-snooping kits.
Finally he gets down to my more extravagant insta kill explosive snooping kits.
After having some fun watching someone committing suicide over and over again I am fixing to turn in for the night. On may way to log out I come across one last criminal named Danny Ocean. Upon me serving him Justice a grey Mia runs into my screen with Mistah T hot on her trail; but recalls away before I can join the chase.
I decide to get some rest for the night. And this is the end of this days report.
Border Patrol out *salutes*
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Re: 8-14-11 Patrol
The careful observer will notice a distinct difference in Officer Border Patrol's clothing, weapon, and armor between parts 3 and 4. This is because the glorious rogue Reebdoog, who soon after dying in a disgracefully surprising 45 damage vanquishing axe hit at 13 seconds on his bandage, re-equipped and dealt swift justice to not one, but three members of the BPD. And by BPD, I mean the Brutality Police Department. To all of my fellow thieves who spend hours in the black and white just to buy a few more wheels of cheese: their actions will be watched and justice will be dealt to the brutes and bullies from time to time. Their growing numbers mean only that we must be increasingly vigilant.
In Solidarity,
baubtastic/Reebdoog/Yale/Sebastian/?
In Solidarity,
baubtastic/Reebdoog/Yale/Sebastian/?
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- THIS is justice.
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Re: 8-14-11 Patrol
There's a lot of things omitted from these reports, which of course makes sense from the perspective they're being written from.
Kinda sad he didn't share more of the events/conversation that happened when Chipmunk Cheeks and the other Border Patrol were at the BPD headquarters.
Some of it was a little smack talk, but to be honest the "poor innocent noob", Larseus was a really poor sport. Yes, Larseus had initially whined at the real Border Patrol for actions done by the likes of myself and my accomplice. Mission accomplished on our part, as our intention was to try to generate some negative press for the ruffians at the BPD. (Whats a pie-rate to do when the adventures at seas these days are really lacking)
Kinda sad he didn't share more of the events/conversation that happened when Chipmunk Cheeks and the other Border Patrol were at the BPD headquarters.
Some of it was a little smack talk, but to be honest the "poor innocent noob", Larseus was a really poor sport. Yes, Larseus had initially whined at the real Border Patrol for actions done by the likes of myself and my accomplice. Mission accomplished on our part, as our intention was to try to generate some negative press for the ruffians at the BPD. (Whats a pie-rate to do when the adventures at seas these days are really lacking)
Hythloth Tower for Sale. Contact Boondock_Saint via PMs because it's his and not mine. Azheman will broker the deal, naked.